Andy for President in 2008

I am officially announcing my candidacy for President of the United States in 2008. Despite failing certain minor requirements like being less than 45 years old, and not living in the country, I feel that I am qualified to become your next President. I will make the whole country happy.

Young People
You will be emancipated from your parents and guardians, and released into the wild to be raised by wolves.

Old People
I will keep the young people off your lawns and from wearing baggy clothing.

Adult People
Only businesses will pay taxes. Not individuals. Also, you will no longer make more or less money than you deserve. Poor and Rich will be non-existant.

Fat People
Fast food will no longer cost money, but instead will cost in miles. Cheeseburger? French Fries? 1 Mile. Supersized? 3 Miles.

Cannibal People
You can eat the excess fat removed in liposuction and similar procedures.

Ugly People
Free makeovers for everyone! Beauty not guaranteed.

Short People
You will be assigned a "short buddy" in which you sit on top the shoulders of your buddy so you can be a regular height. You'll have to take turns. It's only fair.

Black People
The terms "Black", "African-American", "Negro" and the like are no longer allowed. Now you are "Chocolate-Americans". Everyone likes chocolate.

Asian People
You will be in charge of the education and martial arts systems.

Doggy People
You will learn to pick up your own poop and greet people and other animals with more respect than sniffing private areas.

Immigration Peoples
A river will be built to seperate USA from it's neighbors. Several bridges will be constructed and border patrol will be replaced by the Orcs of Isengard. If you survive, you are an American.

Gay Peoples
You will be lab rats for the Aliens. Butt probes.

Foreign Policy
Everyone gets one Nuke. Even Switzerland.

Everyone will be happy with me as President.

Black People
The terms "Black", "African-American", "Negro" and the like are no longer allowed. Now you are "Chocolate-Americans". Everyone likes chocolate.

that was funny

i like that rich and poor would be non existant

Foreign Policy
Everyone gets one Nuke. Even Switzerland.

That even better i like ya forgein policy the one about young one being rasied by wild wolves scares me tho.

Andy wrote:

I am officially announcing my candidacy for President of the United States in 2008. Despite failing certain minor requirements like being less than 45 years old, and not living in the country, I feel that I am qualified to become your next President. I will make the whole country happy.

Young People
You will be emancipated from your parents and guardians, and released into the wild to be raised by wolves.

Old People
I will keep the young people off your lawns and from wearing baggy clothing.

Adult People
Only businesses will pay taxes. Not individuals. Also, you will no longer make more or less money than you deserve. Poor and Rich will be non-existant.

Fat People
Fast food will no longer cost money, but instead will cost in miles. Cheeseburger? French Fries? 1 Mile. Supersized? 3 Miles.

Cannibal People
You can eat the excess fat removed in liposuction and similar procedures.

Ugly People
Free makeovers for everyone! Beauty not guaranteed.

Short People
You will be assigned a "short buddy" in which you sit on top the shoulders of your buddy so you can be a regular height. You'll have to take turns. It's only fair.

Black People
The terms "Black", "African-American", "Negro" and the like are no longer allowed. Now you are "Chocolate-Americans". Everyone likes chocolate.

Asian People
You will be in charge of the education and martial arts systems.

Doggy People
You will learn to pick up your own poop and greet people and other animals with more respect than sniffing private areas.

Immigration Peoples
A river will be built to seperate USA from it's neighbors. Several bridges will be constructed and border patrol will be replaced by the Orcs of Isengard. If you survive, you are an American.

Gay Peoples
You will be lab rats for the Aliens. Butt probes.

Foreign Policy
Everyone gets one Nuke. Even Switzerland.

Everyone will be happy with me as President.

Wow, Can this be applied to the whole world, all hail Tyrant President Andy, I'll move to America, you can tell the Orcs to let me pass, I am to sexy to die... Chocolate-Americans... that made me laugh xD

There is only one thing that I liked about what you said that you will do, and that is about the taxes.

I'll only vote for you if you make Topless Dancers' Day a real holiday.

I made my first campaign commercial. It says why you should not vote for Commax. http://www.megaupload.com/?d=BVFASVAA It's 700-something KB. You can download it even if you're 28K.

Just type in the letters they want you to put in the box and then wait for 60 seconds while they pretend it is taking them time to fetch your request.

The video would be 100x better had I added music, but I thought it would make it unnecessarily bigger. Pretend it is narrated by James Earl Jones, and the music is evil sounding, changing into "America the Beautiful" when my picture shows up.

xD... that was funny, should've had music though.

You must make him your running mate...

Lmao! i was gonna voe for Obama but screw it man you have my vote lmao bob saget lol